You’re excited for your big day. You’ve found the perfect venue. You’ve chosen a beautiful dress. You’ve invited all of your closest family and friends. But you can feel that old familiar knot in your stomach.
The prospect of being greeted by hundreds of smiling faces, the hours of ceremony, and the late-night celebrations don’t thrill you. The same goes for loud music, the speeches and the conversations. As an introvert, you know you’ll feel exhausted by the end of the day – so how can you protect your energy and ensure you fully enjoy yourself? In this post, we provide you with a handful of tried-and-tested tips and tricks to get you through your wedding day as an introvert.
The Scoop on Introversion: Maybe You’re Not So Shy Afterall…
Many people have misconceptions about introversion. You may have been saddled with the labels, “shy”, “anti-social”, or “unfriendly”. On the flipside, some people may know you as the life and soul of the party and be perplexed by your self-proclaimed life-long introversion. Many people confuse shyness for introversion, but you may feel that this label doesn’t fit you at all – you may feel perfectly confident and comfortable in front of others.
Once confined to the realms of psychoanalytic speculation by the likes of Jung and other psychologists, introversion and extroversion are now common knowledge.
As these terms have become interwoven within our understanding of social interaction, neuroscience has also explored the difference between our two main ways of approaching the social world. Contrary to the usual myths out there, introversion is not about fear or a dislike of socialising – rather, it’s a case of where you draw your energy.
Neuroscience shows that extroverts have a blunted response to dopamine, produced by stimuli such as music, the bustle of crowds, or conversation. Comparatively, introverts are more sensitive to dopamine and quickly become physically drained by extended periods of stimulation. The two differences are down to physical differences in the brain, rather than social characteristics.
Jennifer Granneman at Quietrev explains her experience here:
“For my extroverted friends, the noise and the crowd at the concert were simply all part of the fun. In fact, this intensity of stimulation acted as a cue to them that they were achieving their goal (the reward of socializing and a fun night out). Yet, for me, as the night wore on, the hubbub became annoying and tiring—even punishing—as I became overstimulated.”
What Does That Mean For You on Your Wedding Day?
An introverted bride or groom will quickly grow tired, even if they are enjoying socialising. Luckily, there are several techniques you can use to help boost your energy.
Start Your Day Well
Extroverts may love to start their wedding day with their loved ones, but as an introvert, it may be vital for you to take the morning to have your makeup applied or suit fitted in a quiet room. You could also spend the early hours of the morning walking, reading, or journaling to help you feel energised for the day ahead.
You may be enjoying celebrating your day with your family and friends, but as an introvert, it can be important to take small, subtle breaks. Maybe take a few minutes to reapply your makeup or spend some time outside with a friend before heading back into the party.
You don’t have to be stressed at the thought of socialising all day and night for your wedding. Just remember that it’s not about feelings, but brain chemistry. If you need to take a break, take one without feeling guilty about it.